The News In Shorts

How the news would look if everyone stopped waffling and told the truth.

Sunday 22 April 2012

Cameron And Osborne Form Very Unfunny Comedy Duo.

Cameron: "I say, I say I say, my Dad was a tax-dodging millionaire. Osborne: "Your Dad was a tax-dodging millionaire? You think you've got problems, my Dad, the 17th baronet of Ballintaylor and Ballylemon, keeps boasting about his money in the newspapers." Cameron: "At least you and I are both in this together." (Canned laughter) Both "Give me sunshine......" In the great tradition of comedy duos, Morecambe and Wise, Laurel and Hardy and Abbott and Costello, Cameron and Osborne are having to serve their apprenticeship in some very tough venues. However, despite 18 months of gigs up and down the country this is one comedy duo that seems incapable of ever being funny. They have some good catch lines, "We're all in this together," "There's no alternative," and "The Big Society," but even the addition of a silent partner, Nick Clegg, to do all the pratfalls seems to have fallen flat. Worse still, even guest appearances by a ginger rodent cannot seem to lift their ratings. Why? Because, as our Comedy critic points out; "They're bloody crap - unconvincing and without any sense of timing whatsoever. It's also very difficult to find anything funny in mass unemployment, rising inflation, a growing national debt, the privatisation of the NHS, vulnerable and disabled people being kicked to death on stage, or tax breaks for their rich mates. To be honest they should split up and find another way to annoy people."

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