Nick Clegg, the world's most famous political prisoner, was allowed to speak to the media today by his captors, the notorious "We're Tories And Don't Need A Mandate" faction. Often incoherent after months of psychological torture and solitary confinement in the basement of No.10, Nick shocked the world by agreeing that his captors were right about the NHS all along and that his former political principles were mere naive illusions. In a confused statement he told the BBC that the NHS cannot be "frozen in time" but must move forward in a retrograde manner back to the 1840's. We asked a leading psychologist for his view; "Nick is showing all the signs of Stockholm Syndrome - a psychological state in which hostages identify with their captors. It's akin to brainwashing and comes about when the only form of communication is between the victim and the hostage-takers. Nick has been increasingly isolated from the real world and reliant on the Tories for his every need. However, I am not entirely convinced to be honest. I believe that it's just as likely that he has always been a closet Tory - perhaps even a Tory mole - rather like Tony Blair."
No comments:
Post a Comment