The News In Shorts

How the news would look if everyone stopped waffling and told the truth.

Tuesday 6 December 2011

Lobbyists Are Wasting Their Money.


The Tory party has vigourously denied that it is influenced by lobbyists. We asked a Tory party spokesperson why lobbyists continue to spend millions on the activity; "I have no idea. No minister has ever spoken to these people and has never been influenced in any way - even when the companies involved gave us millions of pounds in "donations." The only lobbyists that exist are the unions who have the Labour party in their thrall and bribe that party to deliver such socially evil things as full employment and worker's rights. The so-called corporate lobbyists are simply innocent business-men who feel compelled by their generous and charitable natures to throw money at us. They are saints."

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