The News In Shorts

How the news would look if everyone stopped waffling and told the truth.

Sunday 16 October 2011

Liam Fox "Not Running An Independent Foreign Policy."

William Hague, following his triumphant analysis of the "Occupy" movement, has been moved to comment on allegations that Liam Fox was pursuing an independent foreign policy. "Liam was doing no such thing," the annoying balding little pratt told the BBC. "It was simply a money-making scam - an elaborate shell game who's only victims were a bunch of foreigners who don't count. I see it more as a merry jape than anything - a schoolboy prank that, perhaps, got a little out of hand. We in the Tory party should have a more relaxed attitude to it - as we do to many other things - and just admit that boys will be boys or girls or whatever. I mean its not as if Liam was humping sheep or something - well not recently anyway. We remain confident that the whitewash we've arranged will find that he did nothing wrong and that, by extension, anything else we might be up is perfectly acceptable as well. He only resigned because of a mendacious media witch hunt that viciously sought to uncover the truth."

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