The News In Shorts

How the news would look if everyone stopped waffling and told the truth.

Wednesday 12 October 2011

Adam Werritty Admits To Being A Benefit Cheat.

Adam Werritty has had to admit that he's a benefit cheat when it was revealed that he has no visible means of support and has no actual job. "It's true," he blurted to our reporter in an emotional outburst. "I don't have a job and have no income. I'm forced to live off state benefits but must also add that these benefits are incredibly generous. They enable me to follow Liam Fox around the world for no particular reason and meet with some very intresting and important people to whom I have nothing to say. Nor have these benefits been stopped despite the fact that I jet off abroad at the drop of a hat for no particular reason." We asked Ian Duncan Smith for his view; "This is quite shocking but offers evidence for what I've always maintained - state benfits are too generous and should be stopped for the undeserving. People who are unemployed, disabled and the like. People like Adam Werritty, however, are a special case and need to be protected in case they blackmail ministers."

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